Hickie’s Old Fashioned Hamburger Inn Interlude

On the way to Mayberry Days in 2015, my buddy Rob and I stopped for burgers at a spot in New Boston, Ohio I had heard about called Hickie’s Old Fashioned Hamburger Inn. New Boston sits on the banks of the Ohio River and is just a few miles upriver from Portsmouth.

Hickie’s Hamburger (as it is more commonly called) is a New Boston institution. It is a classic, unpretentious, old-school diner. The name apparently comes from the last name of the original owners: Hickman. When we walked into the small dining room by the main entrance, it was crowded but we did spot an empty table nearby. I caught the eye of one of the servers right away and asked if we were supposed to seat ourselves. She said, “Yep!” In retrospect, I noticed a few people smile as we sat down but I chalked it up to locals reacting to a couple of out-of-towners.

In just a minute or two, the woman came over and said more than asked, “So y’all have never been here before?” We told her it was our first time and she then asked, “Where y’all from?” We told her near Cincinnati. She then looked away from us toward the rest of the patrons and loudly yelled, “Hey, everybody! We got us a couple o’ VIRGINS here from Cincinnati!” with quite the emphasis on the word “virgins.”

We soon realized this was a tradition at the diner. Before we left, we saw other unsuspecting customers get the same treatment. That alone would have made the trip memorable but she wasn’t done yet. But first, another server took our food orders.

Does this place have the best burgers you’ve ever eaten? No. Are they huge burgers? No, closer to sliders. Are they worth having? Absolutely. I splurged and had the “Big Yogi,” the most expensive burger on the menu. It was $3.50. I also had a regular cheeseburger for another dollar and a quarter. (The server said most people ordered three of the standard burgers.) While not quite the Northern dish of poutine, we also ordered a side of fries with gravy ladled over them. The burgers were not served on plates, but just on a piece of wax paper.

The best part of the experience though was the staff. Service was quick and friendly. The woman who announced we were “virgins” was presumably the owner. She visited with us a bit and informed us she and her girlfriends were going to Vegas in two weeks, then added, “We’re hopin’ to get lucky!” After she posed for a picture with me, she reached up and tapped the side of my neck and said that sometimes customers get the restaurant’s namesake before they leave. What a hoot!

Needless to say, Rob and I loved it. I would go back again in a heartbeat for such a fun experience alone, though the food is certainly good and unquestionably cheap.